Losing My Religion

One nation under God
God, show us the way
The science of opinion
God is not a buffet
You pick what you want so no God on your plate
The preacher isn’t God
Religion’s first mistake
Serving stewards, shepherds, not kings

-Kirk Franklin: Losing my Religion

Over the years, my perception of God has evolved.

From childhood to my early 20s, my relationship with God was an exploratory one. I grew up in a Christian household, but I wasn’t bound by religious dogma. I was allowed to question doctrines that I did not understand without feeling like I was committing some sort of unforgivable sin by questioning the authority of the acclaimed ‘Almighty God.’

During my journey, I would come across Christians who would proclaim that the only way to be “saved” or get to heaven or to hear God’s voice was by being a Christian. But somehow, I always found it difficult to wrap my head around this viewpoint. So like, are we saying that people of other religions or spiritual disciplines are somehow doomed because their connection with God isn’t achieved through practicing Christianity? Hmmph. I had a huge problem with that. And so I set out to explore God on my own terms.

But  I didn’t really need to venture too far to begin this exploration. The journey started right at home, where I lived. My father was (and still is) an avid reader, and so we had an impressive library filled with books that had eclectic subject matter. Some of which included books on Taoism, Buddhism, Mysticism, Kabbalah, Islam, New age spirituality, Metu Neter etc.

I was fascinated by the fact that irrespective of the divergent doctrines each of these people believed in, there were two elements that were common to all: Their belief in a higher power & the concept of having faith in possibilities that transcend human capabilities.

Attending school overseas, traveling and meeting people from different walks of life affirmed the theoretical insight I had acquired from those books in practical terms: Even in division, we are all one.

I love the fact that I grew up in such an open-minded household that encouraged me to explore and define my spiritual identity on my own terms. It allowed me to discover which spiritual discipline I wanted to follow, without anyone forcing their own beliefs down my throat.

I chose to be a Christian because it was through this discipline that I truly gained a supernatural connection with God. I actually truly found God outside Church. Many think that church attendance and visiting a pastor for prayers are the only way to connect with God. From my experience, it is not. Here is a summary of experiences that helped me choose the path of Christianity:

1. Divine Revelations: Throughout my life, whenever I would pray about any challenges calling on the name of Jesus and standing on the Word, God never fails to reveal the source of those challenges as well as solutions to me. Most especially through dreams. A lot of the time, these dreams come to me in figurative terms. But then when it plays out in reality, it all makes sense. Sometimes even when I don’t pray, God will just give me these dreams that help guide my path. Now I’m not saying the gift of prophecy can’t be obtained by following other religions. Not at all. I’m just telling you what has worked for me. When I would have these dreams, I tried to explore their source, thinking maybe there could be another source other than through Christ. I visited psychics and fortune tellers. But they couldn’t do anything for me. It was and continues to be in Jesus’ name that I’m able to have these prophetic dreams, and this God-given intuition. It blows my mind.
2. Overcoming insecurities: In Bible class in high school (CRS class. That’s what it was called back then. LOL if you know, you know… Geez now I feel old hahah) we would recite this verse from the bible “love your neighbour as yourself.” Back then, I had no idea what this meant. They were just empty words that held no meaning. But over the years, I truly began to really understand the full implications of loving your neighbour as yourself. Gosh I used to be so insecure during my college days. I got into college at age 16 and the pressures of living in a foreign country and trying to appreciate who I was amongst people who seemed so perfect… it really took it’s toll on me. And this affected my relationship with people, and even stifled my potential. I didn’t love myself. I wanted to fit in with everyone else. And by having this mindset, I inadvertently stifled God’s plan for my life because I was trying to be a part of other people’s destinies, instead of focusing on mine. But through divine discernment given by God, I was able to quickly remedy this situation before it could totally ruin my life. I began a journey of self-discovery and self-acceptance that eventually led to genuine self love and the ripple effect was love and empathy towards others, and granting myself permission to succeed in life because of the love I had for myself which pushed me to attain greater heights.
3. God never gives me anything I have no capacity to handle: Now don’t get me wrong. Just like anyone else, I have experienced some really challenging periods in my life.  As Christians, God never promised us that our lives would be perfect. Nope. What we are promised as that no matter what the situation may be, God will give us the grace to get through it. And that’s been the story of my life so far. I’ve experienced some really sad times in my life but through some willpower that transcends human understanding, the grief never consumes me. What gets me through is I continue to stand on the Word, and God continues to reveal to me the purpose for whatever tough season I may be going through at the time.

I could go and on giving you reasons why I have chosen Christianity as my path to knowing God, but I think this article is long enough already LOL. Plus, I’m pretty sure that by now you get the point.

Anyways. Yes I am a Christian. But I will continue to respect people who choose to follow and serve God on their own terms.

My advice to you guys is that you should explore God on your own terms. Ask questions. Think critically. Don’t let anyone define your spiritual identity. Not your church, not your pastor, not your family, friends, or partner.

Lose the world’s ideology of who/what your God should be. Find your religion by yourself. By doing this, you will find true fulfillment.