A first date is an opportunity, not only to find out more about your date, but also to showcase your best features. But what is expected of you on a first date? If you’ve been out of the dating game for some time the norms may have changed a little so here’s a quick list of do’s, dont’s and essential guidelines to keep in mind.
Be yourself
Although it may be tempting to over-exaggerate how perfect your life is and feign a personality that isn’t really you, please resist that urge. It’s not a job interview! You are looking to connect with this person on a deep level and see if there’s any chance that you two may be compatible. The best way to do this is to be yourself 100%.
Be on time
There was a time when it was thought that to spice things up and to heighten expectation of your date, they should be kept waiting. That’s a lame school of thought. Don’t be that person. If you are running late due to unforeseen circumstances, call your date on the phone and let them know that you’re going to be unavoidably late. It’s common courtesy and shows you are a considerate human being.
Have your OWN money
It’s old fashioned to expect a man to pay for a woman’s meal and, although he might offer, you should not assume that the man will pay. Always have your own money just in case.
Have something to talk about
It sounds obvious but one of the biggest fears people have about first dates is that the conversation will dry up. To avoid this happening look through your date’s social media pages and look for things that you might want to know more about. Subtlety stalk them online but don’t reveal every information you found about them, unless they might think you are a crazy stalker lol. People tend to be interested in people who are interested in them. So show genuine interest!
Be knowledgeable about eclectic topics
There’s only so much personal information you may want to share on a first date, so it’s good if you have some other topics of conversation to draw upon. Surfing the Internet and catching up on the latest trends around news, fashion, entertainment, movies or even events coming up in your local area will help keep the conversation flowing.
Use body language to good effect
Stand up when you greet your date, make eye contact and keep your body language open and receptive. Remember that 85% of what we communicate is non-verbal. Avoid awkward scenes as much as you can.
DON’T
Have your mobile phone on the table
Don’t even check it while you are on the date. Put it on silent or vibration mode for the duration of the date and give the person in front of you your full attention.
Update your social media status
You have to draw a line here because while you may want to be discreet about the fact that you are on a date, it is also okay to update your status about a picture of the hangout spot at least, for safety reasons, just in case things go awry. I mean after all, you’re only meeting said person for the very first time. Also, make arrangements to let your friends and family know how it is going, a quick text every now and then wouldn’t hurt.
Talk about your ex
This is one of the fastest ways to put a new date off. A first date is about looking to the future rather than dwelling on the past. Stay off this topic totally.
Overshare
Many people make the mistake of using a first date like a therapy session. Given a kind face and an attentive ear it’s easy to fall into the trap of offloading all your emotional baggage. Keep it light and remember you’re both meant to be having fun.
Wear anything uncomfortable
Wear something you feel comfortable in. The last thing you want to concern yourself with is a waist trainer that’s squeezing your stomach to the point where you can hardly breathe, or a strapless bra that keep slipping down. Look your best but don’t dress completely out of character – your date wants to meet the real you. Don’t try to overly impress your date.
Above all else, stay safe and remember that a first date with someone is simply an introduction. It’s a chance to have “alone time” and find out if you’d both like to go on more dates.
Photo Credit: Getty Images
