Body shaming is becoming a major societal problem. People throw shade at you because of your weight, and make you feel inferior because your are fat or slim.

In my own case, I am slim and I really love being slim, as a matter of fact, I  admire beautiful  slim ladies like myself. However, I  have faced criticisms about my weight from well-meaning friends and relatives. Some will say: ”Ada, you are not eating well, see your bones are showing, your eyes have gone inside, your jeans no longer fit. Must your always slim fit your dress?” etc.

Psychologically, these comments are unhealthy because they tend to create an inferiority complex amongst us, as slim ladies. Sometimes I wonder why I am from this part of the world where your well-being is judged based on your physical appearance. There is an annoying stereotype about slim ladies being unhealthy and hungry. (rolling eyes)

In terms of dating and relationships, body image is also a factor, as most Nigerian men prefer their women with a bit of flesh, like big boobs and ass (pardon my language. Just trying to be say it as it is here). I have been in a relationship where the guy told me, babe my friends are making jest of me because you are slim, they are asking what I saw in you (story for another day).

Being a slim lady popularly called “lepa ” in Nigerian setting,  is something that you have to psychologically, emotionally and mentally deal with in a healthy way, or else, you might end up with low self-esteem or probably take drastic measures, like drinking pills which can be in the long run be very detrimental.

I have some tips to share with every slim lady who is body-shamed and called all sort of names. These are ways I have successfully  overcome the destructive criticisms, boosted my self-esteem, and made conscious efforts to love the body God has blessed me with on a daily basis.

1. Remember you are wonderfully made: Sounds like a cliché yeah? But I challenge you to take a look at yourself in the mirror and see how beautiful you look. I emphasise that you stand in front of a full mirror, and look at yourself from head to toe, appreciating God’s amazing work. You are made by the perfect GOD, meaning you are perfect.Nothing more, nothing less. Appreciate your body.
2. Always maintain an attitude of gratitude : If you are grateful for your life and the body that God has blessed you with, you won’t be feeling bad about your weight. Imagine the ill people at the hospital who struggle to even breathe. Who cares about their weight? How about corpses at the morgue? Nobody cares about their weight! While you are alive, live your best life.
3. Eat healthy:  Being slim doesn’t mean you should not eat healthy. Be sure to have a healthy diet. I am a picky eater. I also don’t eat too much, so I eat a lot of fruit in between my meals. I put in deliberate effort to always buy fruits –  especially apples and pineapples. When i’m not eating food, i’m eating fruits.
4. Wear clothes that fit you: As a fashion designer, I have a sewing machine in my room, which I use to amend my clothes to fit. I usually don’t  find my perfect size in the market so if i’m not sewing my clothes  to fit my body, I’m amending the clothes I buy. I advice every slim girl to befriend a good tailor. There’s nothing wrong with adjusting your clothes. Slay every outfit, queen!
5. Have a polite response to anyone criticizing your weight: E.g “thank you, I love being slim. It works for me.”  Period!
6. The right man meant for you will appreciate you:  You must have heard someone somewhere at some point tell you that no man will appreciate you because you are too slim.That’s a big lie! Besides, why would I want a man that is only focused on my physical features in the first place, without bothering to get to know my worth, and who I am as a person. Queens, the right man, who is meant for you, will appreciate you, regardless of your weight, height, race or tribe. Reasonable men are looking for content and not just a container. Remember that.
7. The body changes: For most women after childbirth, their body transforms. So enjoy your flat tummy while it lasts. As for me I want to remain a model, hahahahaha.

On a final note, LOVE YOURSELF. The moment you start loving yourself, taking time to know yourself, valuing yourself, then nobody can ever make your feel inferior.

If this article  resonates with you, kindly drop a comment.

Photo Credit: Ada