I really don’t know what’s up with some of our church brothers. But for those that are sincere and would like some useful tips on how to approach that attractive lady in church, read closely:

1. Get Active: Work for God:  One of the best ways to get to know people in church is through volunteering your time or talent. It gives you the chance to interact with different types of people as well as get closer to that lady you fancy.

2. Do not be a show off:  In a highly materialistic society, a church girl would typically want you to be conservative in your appearance.  Don’t try to impress them with your nice clothes or nice car or name dropping personalities you know in church. Sure they notice all those things but they don’t like it when that’s the all you lead with.

3. Do not be seeing unnecessary ‘visions’: I know the “spiricoco” ladies can come across as very serious. Yes, they want the serious intentions but not the overly spiritual approach – you know, “The lord showed me you are my wife” kind of approach. Stop it! Be relatable. Be normal.

4. Be intentional in your approach:  The last thing any woman wants is negative surprises or mixed signals. If/when you do ask her out on a date be open.

Example:

Open Approach:  “I enjoyed your worship session today, there is Nathaniel Bassey concert next weekend…would you like to attend”.

Vague Approach: “you’re a great soloist…I would love to see you praise and worship more. You are blessed.” Huh???

5. Do not stalk her: Even if you really, really, really like a girl, and Jesus told you personally that she is your wife, please do not stalk her. Meaning: Just because the pastor said “give your neighbor a hand shake” doesn’t mean you should cross the aisle to shake her hand OR deliberately sit next to her every Sunday.

In summary, brothers, to pursue a Christian girl, be intentional, be honest and don’t act crazy.