I clutched my pearls when Jada Pinkett-Smith admitted to being used to masturbation at 9 years old after her grandmother taught her how to.
“My grandmother taught me about self pleasuring because she wanted me to know that pleasuring was from me and she didn’t want me to think that when a man gave me pleasure, that it was him and to depend on him in that way.”
Jada Pinkett is back at it again with her jaw dropping conversations back at the Red Table talk show which she hosts with her mum, fondly called, Gammy and her daughter, Willow Smith. You might have to grab a seat for this one. It was no surprise that the 46-year-old actress, whose unconventional approach to life, would seep into other areas such as sexuality but, even we didn’t see this coming. Upon explaining further, she revealed that she abstained from sex partly because of this introduction she was given. I mean think about it, she didn’t have to engage in meaningless sex for a few moments of pleasure with a random man when she could do it herself? I guess in this way, she was taught a level of independence even down to her views on sex.
Despite the gasp-worthy moments, we also learnt a number of things from the mother of 2 and bonus mom of 1. She admits to knowing when both sons lost their virginity because it’s an ‘energy’ thing. “I can always tell even with your friends,” she tells Willow, who seemed pretty uncomfortable throughout the entire conversation – although that might have been due to her walking in on her parents having sex when she was much younger.
Jaden wasn’t allowed sleep overs and neither were you, Willow.
She also spoke about being a mother to children of both sexes who she admits to being protective of in the same manner. Weighing in on the idea that female children are more susceptible to sexual abuse, she gave her alternative opinion, stating that she had known of many young men who had been sexually abused or molested as kids. When she said this, I found myself quipping, “Louder for the people at the back!” So many men I have met over the course of my life would admit to their first sexual experience was with an older woman who did something to them that at the time, seemed weird but enjoyable. Ergo, it wasn’t consensual. It’s important for parents to protect their children irrespective of their sexes.
“So many women I know have never had orgasms because they are not in tune with their sexuality”.
On this, Gammy weighs in speaking about how in her time, good girls were not supposed to enjoy sex. The 64-year-old who got pregnant with Jada at 18 spoke about how finding her sexuality and learning to embrace it was a painful experience, because she had no clue that she was supposed to enjoy it. She further stated that in the era when she grew up, as a woman, sex, was almost seen as an abomination to speak about. She admits that her mother’s sex education with Jada was by far, different from her experience, as she was told that boys were evil and she ought to stay away.
Sex is to be enjoyed when you are ready and are able to love yourself, they all conclude. ‘There’s no rush’, Gammy adds to which Willow looks relieved.
I found myself watching this video thinking that I may need to rethink how I believed my sex education with my future kids would go. But, what say you?
Photo Credit: Red Table Talk
