I remember the first time I heard people speak in tongues. It was wild. Not in a mocking way, but in a “how do they do that?” kind of way. Some people were crying. Some looked like they were floating. And there I was, eyes half open, just… watching.
I wanted it. Not just because everyone else seemed to have it, but because I truly wanted that kind of connection with God. But the more I wanted it, the more I felt like something was wrong with me because it wasn’t “happening.”
I started asking questions in my head that I was too scared to ask out loud: Am I doing something wrong? Do I not have the Holy Spirit? Is my Christianity incomplete? Why does this feel like a spiritual popularity contest?
Somewhere along the line, speaking in tongues became a badge. Like proof you’d “arrived” spiritually. And if you didn’t speak in tongues? People wouldn’t say it, but you could feel it — like your faith was less powerful, your relationship with God less deep.
And then there’s the whole teaching people how to do it — “repeat after me,” “don’t think about it.” Honestly? That made it worse. It started to feel like a performance. And I didn’t want to fake an encounter just to belong.
It took me a while to realize this: tongues are not a test of spirituality.
You don’t earn them. You’re not more Christian because you speak in tongues, and you’re not less Christian because you don’t.
The Bible does talk about speaking in tongues as one of the manifestations of the Spirit. It’s not about proving anything. It’s not a badge of honor or a sign that you’ve “arrived.” It’s not a skill you master in Bible boot camp.
Speaking in tongues can be a beautiful part of your walk with God, but it’s not the ultimate mark of closeness with Him. A real relationship with Jesus is.
When it did happen for me, it wasn’t loud. It wasn’t even dramatic. I wasn’t in a revival or surrounded by fire. I was in my room. Quiet. Sincere. It just… happened. Slowly. Naturally. And not because someone pressured me, but because I was open, and God met me there.
So if you’re reading this and feeling like you’re missing something, hear me:
You’re not broken. You’re not behind.
You’re not less of a Christian. You’re not spiritually deaf.
The Holy Spirit isn’t ignoring you, and He absolutely lives in you, whether or not your mouth moves in syllables you don’t understand.
Speaking in tongues is beautiful. But it’s not the point. Jesus is. And a real relationship with Him? That’s already the most powerful thing you can carry.
