QM Teen Corner is a segment that gives teenage girls a platform to speak about issues they face in their daily lives. We hope that older millenial women who see these posts can use it as an avenue to advice these younger ones, since chances are that they themselves may have experienced similar challenges when they too were teens.
In this article written by Peace Oparaji, she shares how a difficult time in her life made her stronger, by battling with and overcoming inferiority complex.
Do you feel depressed? Are you always quiet, keeping your true thoughts and feelings bottle up? Don’t know how to mingle or interact freely? Always feel like you don’t measure up to standards? Do you feel like your mates are better than you? Do you sometimes feel inferior or like you are nothing? If you’ve anwered yes to these questions, the you are likely suffering from inferiority complex.
Don’t be scared, inferiority complex is not a disease, it just means that you have low self-esteem. And thankfully, this situation is reversible.
I too have experienced this. When doing some research on the subject, I discovered that:
- Children that were raised in homes where they were constantly compared with other kids develop inferiority complex
- Children who failed and were not given the opportunity to try again and were derided often develop inferiority complex
- Children who were rejected for not living up to the expectations of their parents and/or the society often develop inferiority complex
Okay…. I want to share my experience with y’all . l always felt I was never good enough. Anytime I was around my peers, I always felt inferior. Sometimes wished I never existed.
It all began when I was sent to stay with my uncle and his wife. I did everything possible to please my uncle’s wife but NO she was never satisfied with anything I did. She would raise her voice constantly and tell me how useless I was, and then, she will go on and on comparing me with her siblings who lived in the UK.
In that household, when I failed, I was never given the opportunity to try again. And so, I was always afraid of failure and disappointment. Her words really got to me, to the point where I began to see myself as a failure. I felt like I did not measure up to standards. I felt inferior. I started staying indoors. I had no friends.
When I got admission into a university of my choice, I found it hard to mingle with my course mates, and so everyone saw me as the boring type.
The turning point for me was when I saw an advert for an audition online and I actually attended, just for the fun of it. When I got to the venue, I sat alone in a corner, and kept to myself as usual. Then a group of people came up to me, sat down and started discussing a particular topic which I loved. At first, I wanted to join in the conversations and interact with them. But because I was not sure of myself, because I felt inferior, I just had to remain quiet. Then a guy asked the group a question, they all answered wrong. Then out of nowhere, I opened my mouth and I answered correctly. OMG, I could not believe it. I was shocked because prior to that moment, I had never spoken in public before. I started talking and interacting with them and finally, for the first time in years, I actually made friends.
This singuar experience disproved everything my uncle’s wife ever told me. Her bitter words of discouragement that used to always replay in my head suddenly disappeared. In that moment, I finally realized that everything she had said to me was a lie. I was not useless. I was not a failure. I was not dumb. I was finally set free, and today, I’m so much happier than I’ve ever been in my life. It’s amazing how one seeimingly trivial moment can totally change one’s life. After that audition day, my life was never the same.
Guys, I’m writing from my experience, believe it. Inferiority complex can only be cured when you open up, know your worth, and stop withdrawing yourself from the world. You have a voice and that voice must be heard.
Do not be afraid.
Photo Credit: freestockphotos.biz
